Moments
by Lost in Day Dreams
Summary: She had no idea why he could hurt her so.  She just knew that she wouldn't, or couldn't, wish herself free...


Disclaimer (to get it out of the way): I don't own anything, but for a brief moment I control them! Muahahahaha!

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><p>Hello there! I know my name isn't instantly recognizable around these parts and thats easily explained when you consider the fact that I've only ever written one story for this section, and even that was LONG time ago. Lol! That's my fault though. For awhile my obsession with 'The Faily Oddparents' dropped out mostly because they stopped airing it on Nickelodeon regularly and I didn't have the Nicktoons channel...until a few months ago. Now my love for the CosmoWanda relationship came back full force! Hee hee!

So I had this little nugget bouncing around in my brain for a while but you see, I was in college getting my bachelor's in English until last year when I graduated, then after that I was just scrambling to get a job, which I eventually did and have been incredibly busy with that until this June when summer vacation started (such is the beauty of working the school system!) and set a few goals, amongst them being finally getting down all those fanfic ideas I've had in my head but never found the time to write. And lo and behold, my newly reinforced 'Fairly Oddparents' love just happened to coincide with that new goal. Yay!

Anyhoo, I've had this all written out for about a week but keep reading and re-reading it to perfect it, because seriously, there are some _insanely_ talented writers in this section and its a little intimidating. Lol. I found myself starting to hate it completely though, so I figured I might as well just post it before I lose all nerve and delte the darn thing! I really, _really _hope my first writing attempt in three years doesn't disappoint though. If it does, feel free to be as harsh as possible because I'd probably deserve it anyway. Lol!

And without further ado...enjoy. :)

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><p>Sometimes she considers leaving.<p>

At her most bitter moments, Wanda actually considers leaving everything behind and poofing away. No note. No explanation. Just one simple _poof _and she'd be gone. Away from the anger. Away from the confusion. And away from the pain.

She loves them both. Even at this very moment when Timmy and Cosmo, currently disguised as a green squirrel to accompany her own pink squirrel self, are laughing their heads off at the insult Cosmo hurled her way, right along with that enormous acorn that's sure to leave quite the considerable lump on her head. She has no idea what had been said, nor does she really care to know. All she knows is that she still loves them both with all her heart, and it confounds her. None more so than with the case of Cosmo.

There was still nothing she wouldn't do for that green-haired fool. Literally _nothing_ she wouldn't do. If the situation called for it, Wanda would lay down her very life for him, and proved it by nearly doing so on several occasions. And even for all her need to be free of the pain that she carried with her, she knew she couldn't stay away forever, not if it meant letting go of the love that bounded her to the pain. Not even if Cosmo confirmed her worst fears; not even if he flat-out told her that the love he once had for her was gone and never coming back, she _still_ wouldn't wish herself free of it. She'd still go on loving him 'til it killed her.

She wondered if he ever would tell her. Her Cosmo was not one for deep conversations or confrontation for that matter. But would he really string her along if he didn't love her just to avoid the painful and possibly awkward conversation of admitting it to her?

No. He would never be that cruel. He wasn't capable of it. Even for all his agonizing jokes and gestures, Wanda knew he couldn't intentionally hurt a fly. His heart bleeds for nonsensical items like nickels. No, he wasn't stringing her along, but she couldn't help but wonder if he had stopped loving her and didn't even realize it. She never let herself wonder too long, for it would kill her if she did, but after a long day of insults and complaints and watching her husband leer at other women she couldn't help but imagine his love for her, the love that once seemed to light him from within 'til his eyes shimmered like cool water on a warm sunny day every time he looked at her, slowly dry up day by day until there was nothing left but the cold glimmer she more often sees after a joke is delivered at her expense. It was maddening when she allowed it to be; and in the most ironic of all ironies, the only salve that can cool her frenzied mind is Cosmo himself, and all the things he did to show that he still might love her as much as ever.

And it wasn't even any of the grand, cliché gestures any other husband might do when he feels he's upset his wife, gestures that come accompanied with flowers or chocolates. As much as she loved those moments too, they weren't the ones that meant the most to her. It was simply the fact that for all his forgetfulness, he never fails to remember what she likes. How he never fails to poof up her favorite kind of chocolate when she's sad or upset; or poof her to her favorite place on earth for a little break when he finds her thinking too much, which always worries him because he fears that she'll just completely lose herself in her own mind and slip away from him forever.

She loves how he always seemed to gravitate towards her, whether he realizes it or not. Just like the time they accompanied Timmy to the pet store as he attempted to land a job there with nothing but a resume written in crayon and a fake moustache (Trixie Tang had mentioned something about finding it cute when boys work in pet stores, hence the hare-brained scheme). Secure in the knowledge that this one would fail on its own, Wanda decided to disguise herself and Cosmo as children and browse through the aquarium accessories just to pass the time. They actually found something they both wanted to place in their own fishbowl, and all that was left to do was mull over which color to choose.

_"Pink! Pick pink!"_ Cosmo had suddenly burst out. "_Pink is the best color in the world!" _Wanda was immediately touched.

_"Oh Cosmo…."_

_"What?"_

There was also another instance when they joined Timmy on a trip the candy emporium at the Dimmsdale Mall. Cosmo saw the infinite rows of cylinder dispensers filled with jelly beans and immediately fell in love with the concept. After Timmy went to bed, Cosmo poofed into their castle and took off like a shot to one of the spare rooms that wasn't already designated as something. By the time Wanda got there, all four walls were lined with jelly bean dispensers, in every color and flavor she could ever imagine. She floated past all the rows admiring his work, when she noticed that one dispenser was filled with two different colors, pink and green.

_"Cosmo,"_ she had said, _"these two jelly beans got mixed up."_ She waved her wand and separated them but Cosmo immediately flew to her side in protest.

_"No,"_ he had cried as he undid her work with a wave of his own wand, _"they're _supposed _to be like that! Pink and green belong together!"_

Moments like that might not have been much to the casual observer, but they meant a lot to her. She liked to think it meant she was still in the forefront of his mind, so much so that even something like the color of her hair and eyes took on a greater meaning to him. She knows she loves green for that very same reason. To her green is the color of whimsy, warmth, and love. Maybe pink was just the same for him.

She loves how he still craves her touch. On his more loving days and when Timmy's not looking, he'll steal a kiss from her, or plant one on her cheek, or take her hand and squeeze it just to feel her skin against his. Even his most trivial injuries, such as a paper cut or a bruise from bumping into a wall, never feel better until Wanda presses her lips against them. And most mornings when they dress for the day, Cosmo will purposefully poof his tie on crooked, just so she can float over to him and adjust it. She's tried it to where she poofs it on straight for him but he'll just poof it crooked again until she concedes to do it by hand, and tilting his head so far down that her knuckles can't help but graze against his chin.

And sometimes her touch seems to be the only thing that can save him. Cosmo tends to have horrible nightmares some nights, about losing his nickel or drowning in cheese or any other nonsensical thought that last enters his brain before he slips into slumber and turns against him when his defenses are down, and more often than not all Wanda has to do is lay her hand against his forehead and he immediately quiets, as if he can somehow sense her calming presence. It never ceases to astound her.

There was one occasion, however, when Cosmo was thrashing about wildly in his racecar bed, kicking and screaming at the top of his lungs, and Wanda's touch did nothing to comfort him. Finally she grabbed him by the shirt collar.

_"Cosmo! Cosmo, wake up!"_ she had shouted as she shook as hard as she dared to without hurting him. His eyes were shut but his brows were pinched with so much tension and he continued to scream so horridly that Wanda had felt tears of fear sting her own eyes for him. _"Cosmo, please, _please_ wake up!"_

His eyes had flown open so unexpectedly that the sudden flash of green in the dark room startled her, so it had caught her off guard when he threw himself into her arms and they had both tumbled to the floor. Cosmo had shivered fiercely in her arms and his quiet, hiccupping sobs had pounded against her shoulder as she stroked his wings in an attempt to soothe him. She gently prodded him to tell her what his nightmare had been about that was so terrible, but for a long while all he had done was shake his head and continue to hold her so tightly that she had wondered if he would ever let her go, not that she would've minded if he refused.

Finally he had lifted his head to meet her eyes, the tears pooling his own breaking her heart, and he had admitted that the nightmare had been about her. Any other time she would've expected some horrible joke, like he realized in his nightmare that they were bound together forever or something, but the gravity in his eyes told her that jokes were the furthest thing from his mind, so she could only listen with complete shock as he described his nightmare, how it had been set during the whole magic muffin incident when Crocker had Wanda in his grasps and had transformed the world into his own sick kingdom of terror. And how Cosmo had put aside his panic and fear to return all buff and manly to save her….but this time he had come too late. Wanda sat completely frozen and listened as Cosmo described how he was forced to watch Crocker suck all of her magic from her body until there was none left for her and she fell out of the glass orb and to the ground. Dead.

Cosmo had had his face buried in Wanda's shoulder again by that point, his tears soaking through her nightgown until her skin felt as cold as the blood that ran underneath it. She had completely understood his horror over his nightmare; just imagining having to watch Cosmo's life and love ripped away from her was enough to stop her heart dead right there. And Cosmo had to watch it play out right in front him, just beyond his ability to control it.

_"It was so real, Wanda" _he had whispered, each word wavering with more tears, _"It was a long time ago but still, it was like I was there again. Only this t-time…."_

_"Sshh, sweetheart, you don't need say it. It's alright, it wasn't real and I'm right here with you. There's no need to be afraid. I'm here, and I'll always be here."_

They had fallen asleep in each other's arms right there on the floor, and for days afterwards Cosmo had a rough time falling asleep for fear of that nightmare returning. His short attention span spared him from insomnia for the rest of his life, God bless him, and he eventually went back to dreams of pudding and string. Wanda had no idea what had brought on that nightmare so long after the magic muffin incident, or why his subconscious had forced him to play out the "what if he hadn't saved her" scenario. What she did know was that the thought of losing her terrified him like nothing else. Because he loved her; and he couldn't stand the thought of anything happening to her.

He had always been protective of her, sometimes to the point where it was a little excessive, but every protective moment meant the world to her nonetheless. Because she knew her husband better than anybody, which meant she knew his fears were irrational and extensive. But despite all those phobias he still threw himself in the middle of the most dangerous situations just save her from harm.

And while Cosmo's blissfully ignorant nature usually left him happy and carefree, nothing riled his temper like someone or something threatening to hurt her. She recalls an incident not too long ago when Timmy's long forgotten great uncle showed up for an unexpected visit, which quickly turned into a string of baby-sitting jobs for him as Timmy's parents decided to leave their son in the care of his distant relative that was practically a stranger after only twelve minutes of "catching up time". At first he seemed a vast improvement over Vicky and her wildly abusive nature (though the competition isn't stiff when it comes to Vicky versus….well, anybody). He was a bit stoic but never physically abusive, but after awhile he proved to have quite a temper, and as Wanda was currently getting a hard lesson in herself, cruel words can hurt just as bad as any blow from a hand. And when it came to Timmy, insults from the great uncle were never in short supply. But once during one of his rants against Timmy and his very existence, Wanda, who was disguised as a cat along with Cosmo, wandered a bit too far from her godchild and husband's side, and inadvertently had her tail stepped on by the burly man. She instinctively let out a yowl, setting off the great uncle's nerves even further and drawing all of his anger and frustration towards her.

_"And keep this stupid, pink cat out of my way!" _he had demanded in a roar, and lifted his large, booted foot to kick Wanda clear across the room, the wall abruptly and painfully ending her flight.

Timmy had screamed. The great uncle had laughed. And Cosmo had lost it.

Still reeling from the physical assault, Wanda could only watch as her husband turned his worried glance away from her to cast a hateful glare towards their godchild's relative before unsheathing razor sharp claws from his green cat paws and bounding directly towards the man's face.

Cosmo yelled out every profanity he could think of at the man as he slashed and clawed at every piece of flesh he could get close enough too, thankfully coming out as only shrieking cat yowls to the humans present, and his physical assault on the man showed no signs of stopping. Eventually Wanda regained a bit of her senses enough to lift her wand a poof them back to the safety of their godchild's room before his great uncle could get a good enough hold on Cosmo to make him suffer the same fate Wanda had, remembering to erase the oddly colored cats' sudden disappearance from Timmy's great uncle's memory in the process.

Cosmo had still been livid, the fur on his current cat body standing on ends and his claws still poised for attack. Wanda poofed them both back into fairy form and lifted her shirt to survey the damage the loathsome brute had done to her torso with his overly large foot. There was a considerably large bruise, which was as much as she suspected, but when she put a finger to the tender area, pain rippled through abdomen, telling her that he more than likely broke a rib as well. She would be more upset herself if fairies weren't notoriously fast healers. Bones took a little longer to heal, but in a day or two the injuries would be nothing but an unfortunate memory.

_"Did he break anything?"_ Cosmo asked, his tone the kind of even that only intense rage could accomplish. Wanda was afraid to tell him.

_"He might've broken a rib,"_ she finally admitted. _"But you know fairies are notoriously fast healers, Cosmo. It'll be fine in no time."_ She poofed bandages around herself to inhibit movement and promote healing. _"See? Already a thousand times better."_ She had given him a smile to coax one out of him but it hadn't worked. He remained tense and angry for hours afterward, and when Timmy's great uncle returned the next day for another baby-sitting gig, Cosmo's wand had glowed a dangerous and fiery red, telling her that he was getting ready to make the man pay for the pain he inflicted on his wife with a great deal of pain of his own. Timmy had seemed to sense this too and interjected quickly with a wish that his great uncle would suffer some sort of accident that was as lethal as 'Da Rules' would allow and that would keep him from babysitting Timmy ever again. With a wave of their wands it was done, but Cosmo had remained unhappy about letting the great uncle off so easily. Wanda had told him to let it go, she had reassured him a million times over that she was fine, that it hadn't hurt that much, that the bruise was gone and her rib was healed, but it was all for naught. Cosmo remained furious at the man, and insisted that he should've paid more for daring to be so cruel to Wanda. That _anyone_ who dared to touch her like that should suffer his wrath.

No, there was no way he had or could ever stop loving her, not when her safety was so forefront in his mind, not when her pain made him worried and furious like nothing else, not when he still yearned to feel her against him. And not when even if he didn't realize it, she was the one thing that clouded his thoughts so much that even the color of her hair took on a special meaning for him. Because all of those things are what happen to her, only she is aware that it's because she loves him so inexplicably and inescapably.

Maybe one day she'd confront him. Maybe one day she'd demand to know exactly why he chose words that cut the deepest simply to get a laugh. Or why he drooled over every aesthetically pleasing face that strolled by. Or while he complained so often about being married to her when it seemed like only yesterday he was down on one knee in front of her and proclaiming that spending the rest of his eternal life with her would be the only way he could be happy and complete. Would it help anything? Would he feel so interminably guilty that it would just eat away at that carefree, fun-loving side of him she treasured so? Or would he simply promise to do better and forget just like he forgot everything else? Neither option seemed all that appealing….

In the middle of her deep, personal introspection, the source of her love and heartache came scurrying up the tree to the branch she was perched on, clutching on to something in his little squirrel paw and calling her name breathlessly.

"Wanda! Wanda! You have to meet my new friend!" Cosmo held out his hand and unveiled his friend with a flourish. "Ta da!"

While already used to being introduced to many nonsensical "friends" over the course of their nearly 10,000 year marriage, she had to admit to being slightly impressed by this one. In her husband's hand sat one of the most unusual bugs she'd ever seen. Physically it could've been just another regular worm, but its colors were what made it truly unique, what with its fuzzy pink body and patches of yellow flecking all across it.

"Wow Cosmo, that's one neat friend you've got there," she said, not having to feign her interest as much as other times when Cosmo presented her with new pets. He grinned even wider at her and rubbed his squirrel paw gingerly over the worm.

"Isn't she great? She's all pink and yellow and beautiful, so I decided to call her…Wanda!"

At that, Wanda's eyes darted from the interesting bug to search Cosmo's fluffy face for any signs that a cruel joke was about to follow, but instead she found him still grinning at her, his eyes sparkling with genuine affection.

"Oh Cosmo…." She bounded over to him and gave him a kiss as best as her currently large squirrel teeth would allow. When she pulled away she saw a charming blush just leaving his cheeks.

"Wow, what was that for?" Wanda rolled her eyes at his forgetfulness but her current smile didn't leave her face.

"Do I always need a reason to kiss you?"

"No way! In fact, I feel another no reason coming on right now!" Wanda's heart fluttered wildly as he leaned in and kissed her again, passionately and unabashedly. She would've been content to just stay that way forever, but their kiss abruptly ended as Cosmo pulled away and gasped.

"Wanda, where are you going?" Thoroughly confused, she was about to respond that she wasn't going anywhere before she realized he was actually looking past her. It was then she realized that the pink and yellow worm had made a quiet and stealthy exit while her new owner was distracted and was now inching its way down the tree and in danger of escaping forever.

"Wanda, come back! You belong with here with me! Wandaaaaaa!" Cosmo took off after the worm, leaving the slightly exasperated and yet still amused original Wanda behind.

_I love you, _she thought, _truly, deeply, whole-heartedly love you._

And this had to be true, for his ignorant cruelty wouldn't hurt as much if she didn't love him so truly. But whatever reasons he had behind being so callous to her lately in the end didn't matter, for she would never stop feeling for him those feelings that engulf her so completely that she couldn't recall a day without them. So by her own choice, she would never know a day without his green eyes piercing into her soul and his hurtful words cutting into her heart.

Because she was in love him.

And that was the only way she knew how to be.

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><p>*peeks out from behind hands* Can I come out now? Or am I forever shamed and banned from this section? Lol! Let me know in a review, if you please! They are always greatly appreciated. :)<p> 


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